None of the Parents, All of the Pie

Blog readers, I know you've all been wondering what classically American dessert Bean and I could have possibly concocted. Or, you know, maybe not because there's really only one.

That's right, everyone. It's time for Apple Pie a la Nug and Bean.

Writing a blog post has never made me so nostalgic for last week.

We had been looking forward to making this pie with our buddies Domsicle and Grape ever since Bean went apple picking, and we were counting on it to be a bright spot in a difficult day. It needed to be perfect, and epitomize all that is good about America in general. With this in mind, we proceeded with our usual slap-shod approach to doing things.


Filling:

Such concentration.

We tasked Domsicle and Grape with cutting up the apples. I'm still confused about how they made such uniform pieces out of such "unique" orchard apples.

Bean was in charge of the filling, so she waxed nostalgic and followed the Joys of Baking's recipe. Or rather, she mixed all of the ingredients from this recipe in a bowl and ignored all of the other instructions. Oh, and she skipped the cornstarch. Still counts?

Despite the improvisation on Bean's part, the result was super tasty. If (when) we make this pie again, we'd probably tone down the nutmeg a bit.

Crust and Spectacular Crumble Topping:

Why Not to Play Library Chicken: The Definitive Visual Guide

While Bean was deciding which parts of the chemical process were unnecessary, I was making pie crust and the crumble topping. The pie crust recipe I use (which, despite what Bean says, I do have memorized) is Williams-Sonoma's basic pie dough. I cut the butter into the flour with my hands. Way more efficient and fun.

The crumble topping, however, was our greatest achievement. When the vague memories of my grandmother's recipe and grand plans for pie perfection proved insufficient, I called home and had my sister look up the recipe for me. Now, because I like you, blog readers, I will share:

Ingredients:

Grape, Nug, and Domsicle performing magic.

1 stick of butter
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 cup flour

Process:

Like making pie dough, this basically consists of chopping up the butter, throwing it on top of the sugar and flour, and mashing them together with your hands.


Baking and its Aftermath:

Once all the components were assembled, we mounded the apples up high in the pan and covered them with the crumb topping. We even thought to put the pie pan on a sheet pan for ease of extraction from our scary oven before sitting down to enjoy our Mac 'n Cheese.

The pie took about an hour to cook, but we had to cover the crumb topping with a piece of tinfoil about 35-40 minutes in to make sure it wouldn't burn.

When it emerged, the house had never smelled quite so heavenly. Somehow I immediately got roped into slicing it, despite my genuine hatred for the whole pie-cutting process. That first piece is always a disaster, and, if you're me, so are all the following pieces.

My protests fell on deaf ears.

The good news was that there was no one to stop me from cutting gigantic slices. The four of us ate half the pie in one sitting. Bean cheered me on by marching around the room and chanting: "No Parents! All of the pie! No Parents! All of the pie!"

That's right, kids. College is awesome, and it never gets old.

ALL OF THE PIE!!!!!!
(The demon baker of Broad Street?)

We're very proud of ourselves for several reasons:

Apple pie a la mode with coffee.
The dessert of the civilized and sleepy.

1) This is the first baking we've done together.

2) This is also the first time we've pulled ourselves together enough to make food that wasn't necessary for basic sustenance. Although, Bean totally had pie for breakfast the next day.

3) We were completely sleep deprived through the whole process, but against all odds, our final product was classy and delicious.





Post-Pie Philosophizing:

In some ways, this is the first time we really took the reins of our cooking experience. We were cobbling together multiple recipes, adding (or subtracting) our own touches, and fusing our childhood memories of apple pie to make a final product was way more than edible.

We were also able to turn cooking into a fun way to bond with our friends Domsicle and Grape, who wanted pie badly enough to put up with our sleepy grumpiness.

All in all, it was everything that mealtime at college should be: relatively easy, social, and delicious.

50 points for Ravenclaw!*

Nugget and Bean, making strides toward adulthood and obesity.

*LET THE RECORD SHOW: Bean is actually a Gryffindor. The Pottermore Sorting Hat said so.